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The Latest Sharing Week 9: A couple of lines from St. Paul’s Letter to the Ephesians hit me really hard this week: You were saved by faith in God, who treats us much better than we deserve. This is God's gift to you, and not anything you have done on your own. It isn't something you have earned, so there is nothing you can brag about. God planned for us to do good things and to live as he has always wanted us to live. I have lived much of my life believing that I have worked hard to earn what I have. But as I have reviewed my life during this retreat, God has shown his mercy to me and has given me the grace to recognize and to acknowledge that God was there with me every step of the way. I have known it in my head and have proclaimed it to others, but now God is challenging me to go much deeper into my hardened and darkened heart. God is asking me to open my heart to Love. I pray that we can open our hearts to our glorious God, to Jesus Christ, our God, model, and guide, and to the movement of the Holy Spirit. Please pray for me, too. Victor, 11/15/24 In the retreat of Week 8, I give thanks and praise to our Heavenly Father for raising me up in Christ and for being with me always in Spirit through the little things of my daily life and the people I meet each day, even if they are not particularly dramatic but ordinary. "Even there your hand guides me, your right hand holds me fast." (Psalm 139.10) † Ave Maria Amen. Akihiko Watanabe Week 7 Recognizing Patterns Gratitude of the grace of seeing patterns, particularly the painful pattern of attaching or relying too heavily/not enough to people, places, practices, purposes - and forgetting what really is most important - God. Thank you Lord for allowing me to feel deeply suffering and to see spiritual freedom clearly this past week and today. I am grateful for receiving the sacrament of reconciliation, humbly praying to surrender to You with all things and to trust deeply that all things come and pass through You. AMDG, J Week 7 (The Disorder of Sin----Personal Patterns) was not easy for me. My most basic fear is to be left all alone unworthy, useless, and unloved in the dark. In my daily life I tend to try to avoid it, refuse it, resist it and escape from it, which must be the unfreedom that often grips me tightly and causes sin within me. Although I know by head that "our hearts are restless until they rest in God"(St. Augustine), I still cannot get out of my sinful patterns. Lord, call me and bid me come to you. Permit me not to separated from you. † Ave Maria, Amen. Akihiko Watanabe Week 6: A Deep Soak in God’s Embrace A rich and powerful week: savoring and integrating the guide and resources in my day to day…week 6’s 7 days has turned into 10-14 days. Feeling grateful to have the spaciousness and the grace to receive time to reflect on my personal life on how I have missed the mark with God through the years, deeply feeling God’s omnipotent love, feeling the opening of God’s omnipresence during times of pain and suffering in the past, present, and I pray in the days ahead that my heart continues to open to this sacred mystery, of the enduring love that the Holy Trinity internally, externally, and eternally provides. (Luke 15:31; Luke 7:49 Luke 18:14) Blessings and graces - J In the retreat of Week 6, I reflected upon my personal sinfulness concretely regarding what I have committed repeatedly in my life with feelings of shamefulness, guilt, self-disgust and sadness deep in my heart. God is so merciful that He never abandoned me but even drew me nearer to Him, covering all of my weakness, although I had not even asked Him to. I give thanks and praise to Our Heavenly Father through Our Lord Jesus Christ. † Ave Maria. Amen. Akihiko Watanabe End of Week 5 In the retreat of Week 5, I reflected upon sinfulness in the world by looking at a photo repeatedly, in which children were affected and hurt in the war, with feelings of sadness, disappointment and anger. People have suffered, but nobody has taken responsibility for them. Only forgiveness of Jesus is salvation for the world. Praised be Jesus Christ. † Ave Maria, Amen. Akihiko Watanabe Week 4 I am particularly thankful for the guide and image of the week as when I found myself starting my week at work with an old feeling of anxiety creeping in I was able to re-orient myself to the guide and image and received the grace, peace, joy of being…Ephesians 2: 8-10 I found it helpful to hold that image and the question of “what inspires” with me this week and the additional resources supportive…aligning oneself to Spirit (Romans 8: 6-9, 13-14), destiny (Romans 8: 18-27), a desire to be with and for God (Romans 9: 28). “I know not what,” I know what is…”the deepest desire…in tune with God’s one intention in creating the universe…[with] the Holy Spirit who dwells in our hearts” - excerpt from Our Desire for God by Barry, SJ. Moving into week 5, I’am seeing a beautiful sunset on my way home from work last week; the image provoked a deep sense of wonder & awe, peace, and an enlivened experience of being alive and aligned with God in my day to day experience. with enjoyment, J In the retreat of Week 4, I give thanks and praise to Our Heavenly Father for having granted me the grace to encounter those inspiring people who love and serve Him and His people in great freedom through Our Lord Jesus Christ. May He guide me always in the company of the Holy Spirit. † Ave Maria Amen. Akihiko Watanabe Week 3: I am gateful for the landscape that God has provided; particularly this week - a home, a craft, a body with hands…One question that came up with the reflecting on the guide is “What is a skillful way to glorify, amplify, return this generous gift of grace to you?” I have noticed that during the midweek, challenges emerge and I have found graces in people, places, purpose, and practices that orient myself to God. A particular grace this week is going to adoration on Friday night and participating in an Alzheimer’s Walk in my community and supporting my friends and family on Saturday morning. Near the end of the nice Autumn walk, an elderly woman, with a serene brim on her face smiled at me and my dog acknowledging the beautiful dog and the wind on her face. As Week 4 begins, my petition and prayer is to know when to skillfully act and when to surrender to the graces of God in the everyday living. I feel they go hand-hand-in hand…joy, peace, and blessings - J In the retreat of Week 3, I tried to be conscious of what I heard and what I saw in the surrounding world of my everyday life, in the morning, during daytime and at night. I listened attentively to some of the people, nature and things I heard. I also looked carefully at some of those creations that I saw. Then I became conscious of the fact that I am part of that surrounding world. I also tried to focus on my breathing about 5 minutes before I began to reflect on the theme of Week 3 each day. It never stops even if I'm not conscious of it. It never tries to draw my attention to keep working. It just keeps going in silence. I have been given life this way and in the process of being created at every moment. So, all the creation surrounding me must be the same way. Everything/everyone has been given life unceasingly and is being created at every moment. If one lives according to the will of the Life giver, that is to give thanks and praise to Him. That is wonderful, isn't that? I'm so happy to be part of our common home in which we share life with one another, but I also feel very sad that "our community" is not always in peace. The Lord is with me to the end. Lord, your mercy endures forever. Never forsake the work of your hands!（Psalm 138.8） † Ave Maria. Amen. By Akihiko Watanabe Week 2: Taking a closer look at some of my past events as I prayed this Week 2, I came to understand that God not only supported me from behind but also gave me a lot of lessons I needed to learn through the encounter with various people He mercifully sent to me. Even in the most miserable discouragement I've ever had in my life, He taught me that there is something I can't overcome only by my own efforts but loving someone is still worth trying, and told me to stand up again and carry on. He also taught me to pray more fervently and to have more intimate relationship with Him through the assistance of good friends I met in a worldwide ministry of the Catholic Church. So, the life I've lived seems to be a long time formation programme led and accompanied by the Holy Spirit. What a beautiful journey! Let's enjoy it still more with great hope and deep joy! Thanks be to God. † Ave Maria Akihiko Watanabe Week 2 has been a nice deeper dive from week 1. Continuing from Fr. Gillick's remarks in week 1 of "letting things go" to make space for this retreat, I am finding that letting things go is a continued theme throughout this week - which feels in harmony with the changing Autumn season. The "panning for gold" and the image of clarity from the example of how NASA receives in image from space was a guiding light / theme this week. I am particularly finding myself engaging and acting in the flow of situations (I.e. the panning for gold), rather than a previous hesitation; and find a complementary rest or being in prayer this week to be deeply restorative (I.e. finding clarity in the images) and serving the doing. I am finding more comfort and confidence being myself, not just in solitude but with solidarity with others which I feel is a big grace for me, as feeling of true acceptance or belonging with people and places has been part of my journey . The conversation of how the love language and communication of the Beloved and loved that is described in the guide is intimate and tender - I value the relationshipal nature of God and pray to continue to listen and let go to receive his revelation and the grace to surrender and yield with the power from God to be, and do what is - AMDG. A particular grace in week 2, was a loving relationship with a friend - I was able to feel a deeper connection and communion with another person that has not been easy or accessible to me in my life until that moment in a bakery shop on a regular Wednesday morning. In gratitude to the dark and light, and everything in between. Blessings ~ J PS: I deeply appreciated and found treasure in the Rainer Rilke poem: I find you, Lord. Week 1, Day 1 It isn't about who you are or who you have become in this life. It's that God made you and you are loved by Him. You are enough just as you are. Remember...God loves you. That's all that really matters. Looking into my both palms, I have reflected during Week 1 upon what my hands have experienced through my life. Joys, sorrows, hardships, challenges and hope. Not all things are comfortable. Now I'm sure that when I was in darkness, where I didn't know what I was doing myself, the PEOPLE I was with are more important than the THINGS that happened to me. I can't help but say it is through the friendship with them or their love for me that the Lord has supported me from behind. What grace! What joy and hope! Life is beautiful with Him. The keynote of my Week 1 is Isaiah 43.1 (Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name: you are mine.) Thanks be to God. † Ave Maria By Akihiko Watanabe Week 1 It feels nice to be connected back Creighton (‘07) with this online retreat. I am grateful for the
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Sharing Archive Week 1 (Part 2) |