These days, the image that presents itself in my mind when I think about the scattered children of God, is the image of refugees from all over the world knocking at the doors of countries that are not their own, hoping for a better narrative than violence and poverty.  Scattered children of God can also be a metaphor for the state of the church, our search for religion that won’t betray, or a lack of a sense of togetherness as Christians.  With the image of the scattered children of God lurking in the background of our minds, the first reading paints an idyllic picture of peace and unity among the people of God, unity of a family—one family under God.  However, the price to be paid for this unity, is the Son of God.

Pause……...Who am I?  What love is this, that the price for my salvation and my freedom, had to be the Son of God?  All this, so that God can unify us and bring us home?  So why do we still scatter?  Why do we create divisions?  It is so easy to see only what divides us.  We are separated by nationality, language, belief systems, political ideas, age, gender, and place; those are easy to analyze, but what will it feel like to put all those things aside for a moment and pray together—even break bread together?  What will it look like to be unifiers and be unified? What happens when we realize that the sacrifice of love was made for all God’s children, even those we don’t like, those who don’t go to church, those who don’t believe as we do, those who don’t look like us?  We all have our purpose; even Caiaphas had a part to play in God’s plan to save us, but not in a way that Caiaphas imagined.  The Eucharist has no boundaries or borders, it is unifying; it is about God’s love for us.

The readings today also made me reflect on things that cause division in my soul; things in my life that have to die for me to live fully for the greater glory of God; death of bad habits, death of grudges, death of my desire to be liked, and death of wastefulness, so that I can live.  Once again, who am I, that the Son of God had to die for my sake?  Having this in mind, my walk towards Holy week is mostly filled with the fragrance of gratitude and a need for humility.  Listen closely these coming days, our love story is about to be told; we are the beloved.  The passion is not just some event that happened a long time ago; it is still happening, and God is still loving us completely.  God is still completely in love with us---the beloved.

And so, it begins, the stage is set for Jesus to be captured, humiliated, condemned and buried in our hearts, minds, and society.  We can hide now, and we don’t feel the need to evangelize; we don’t feel embarrassed or squeamish about the truth; and we don’t have to show any signs that we are Christians in public when discipleship could cost us our lives as we know and enjoy it. Meanwhile, Jesus looks around for us as he waits, and wonders if we will show when the time comes.  God is still trying to unify us into one body; the body of Christ.  We should not be afraid.

During this Lent, I have often had my head down, and it isn’t about shame, pain, or anguish; it is because I am weighed down by the responsibility of this love, the love of God.  Am I worthy?  God thought so, no-----thinks so, and that is why I am mindful of how I live in that love.  My Lent has been about realizing that this life we live as Christians---heartbreak, love, death, life and all----has meaning and substance, and if we even for one moment thought that we weren’t one of the lucky ones with a great movie worthy love story to tell, guess what, in a few days, yours will be told in a big way---our love story with God is heart wrenching indeed.  Let’s ride into the Holy Week in anticipation for our hearts to be cracked open and filled up with loving light. 

Blessed be!

Vivian wrote this reflection in 2019.