The Enigma of Being Small

“Leave your gift there at the altar, go first and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” (Matthew 5: 24)
Today’s scripture depicts keen-sighted wisdom: seeing at a distance and living up close.

The prophet is a thorn in the rulers’ side.  Ahab calls Elijah “you disturber of Israel.”  In their contest over which god is supreme, Yahweh defeats Baal.  To certify the victory, Elijah slays the priests enthralled with Baal.

Many stories are told of Elijah.  The prophet foresees the drought that will grip Israel.  On the top of Mount Carmel, Elijah puts his head between his knees to pray.  Out at sea, a dark blur appears.   Elijah reads the signs and tells Ahab to flee before the storm hits.  Elijah hikes up his garments and outruns the king’s chariot.

Wisdom takes the long view.  We see forces moving in our direction.  On the horizon emerge possibilities and storms of many kinds.  At times the big picture is more than we can manage.  Let me focus on the day’s tasks.  Ignore climate change.  Disregard wars and forced migration.  Tune out messy social movements and disturbing critiques.  To shield ourselves, we wonder who really knows what’s true?  The only hunger I must address is at my kitchen table.  To see at a distance takes resolve; like Elijah we must pray, so we can take action and bring what is far away into our lives.

Matthew’s gospel reminds us that a righteous person attends to small things.  Laws punish murder and robbery.  Behind disaster lies a string of mishaps. Crimes are mesmerizing, so misdemeanors hardly register.  We overlook the flirting that gives way to infidelity.  Like Elijah, Jesus uses threats to redirect us to our lapses and slipups.  Mend relationships early.  The same mouth that screws up must learn to be sorry.  God yearns for a humble spirit, not gold heaped on the altar.

Kierkegaard defines despair as self-rejection.  We are created by God to love God and the world.  Until we accept this, we are in despair.  One form of despair gets lost in the Big Picture; another is absorbed in my own affairs.  To balance the infinite and the finite, the long view with immediate concerns, is more than we can do on our own.  Without God, we can’t figure ourselves out.  God is the mystery that helps us to live the confounding tension of being human.